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Have you often admired the person who is friendly, relaxed and talks easily in a crowd? Most of us have wished that we had more of these outgoing attributes to help us in our work and daily lives.

Confidence comes easily and naturally for some, for many others it seems impossible. The good news is that it is a habit that can be learned to some degree by anyone. It will take some training and practice, but what a great way to be more successful and to feel better.

"The control of the thinking machine is perfectly possible. And since nothing whatever happens to us outside our own brain; since nothing hurts us or gives us pleasure except within the brain, the supreme importance of being able to control what goes on in that mysterious brain is patent. Without the power to dictate to the brain its task and to ensure obedience - true life is impossible." - Arnold Bennett (1867-1931)

A great source for learning self-confidence is of course books. You haven't been alone in the need for information on improving your ability to interact positively with people and there are numerous self-help books available to get you started. Just take an easy approach and read a variety of the best sellers that you feel will benefit you the most.

Using autosuggestion, by repeatedly filling the mind with thoughts of calmness and composure, can improve self-assurance. Picture in your mind, as vividly as possible, a scene in which you are performing very successfully. Picture this again and again so that your mind is totally occupied with your easy performance. This will push out doubt as there is not room for both trains of thought. Every time a negative thought pops up, immediately replace it with positive thoughts.

Affirmations are a similar technique that can work wonders. This is the repeating of positive words about yourself, concerning what you wish to do. The words cram the mind with confident thoughts that have a direct effect on how you feel and act. As an example, if you have to make a presentation - ' I have nothing to lose. They like me and I feel good and comfortable with these people. I am concentrating on them, not on myself. They are not here to be critical of me. I am doing everything slowly, calmly, surely. I am relaxed and breathing deeply and easily. I feel confident about this and am in control.'

"They can because they think they can." - Vergil (BC)


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